Lonely and Confused
by FangirlAllTheWay
Summary: Sierra is abused, bullied, and depressed. She is haunted by nightmares and daydreams of her best friend. Who is dead. Suddenly finding out she is a weapon, and hiding a dark secret, she snaps. Trying to find a place to fit in, she reluctantly joins the DWMA, where she finds the Soul Eater Gang, but they make it even harder to conceal her secrets.
1. Warnings

Hey there! Thanks for attempting to read this fanfiction. I hope that you will enjoy reading it as much as I enjoy writing it!

**Some warnings **- TRIGGER WARNINGS, depression, suicide, self harm, child abuse, bulling, character death

I'm sorry if you don't want to read with these things in the chapters, but I appreciate that you tried to read it.

Here is a glimpse of part of the story at the beginning (Without Major Spoilers) :)

Sierra Jones, the quiet girl, her mother's punching bag. After witnessing her best friends suicide, she can't take it anymore. A song haunts her dreams, reminding her everyday of her friend's neck, and the brown rope around it. She herself walks around the block, looking for a quiet place to die. Then, sick of everything her life has to offer, she walks to a bridge. Throwing her arms out, she starts to fall. She hears a "Wait!" and although she's falling, she catches a glimpse of white hair, a star tattoo, and gorgeous amber eyes. But it's too late. She's off the bridge, everything goes black, and she wakes up in a cold sweat. Little did she know that the mysterious figures had the same dream. When they meet, worlds will come crashing down.


	2. Character - Sierra Jones

Hi guys! This isn't a chapter, sorry, but I thought you guys might want some Backround information iph Sierra before we get started

Disclaimer - I do not own Soul Eater or its characters, otherwise Soma, Tsu*Star, and KidxLiz would be cannon and Maka would become more of a weapon

**Full Name** - Sierra Rachel Jones

**Nicknames** - Cece, Ra, S.J

**Preferred Name** - Ra

**Gender** - Female

**Sexuality** - Bisexual (Not openly)

**Age **- 14

**Weapon** or Meister

**Personality** - Very quiet, speaks only when spoken to, depressed

**Secretive**

**Bilangual **

**Abused at home**

**Bullied at school**

**Antisocial**

**Selfharms **

**Best friend committed suicide last year (hung)**

**Single**

**Only child**

**Father left when she was born**


	3. Chapter 1

FIRST CHAPTER EVERYONE!

Quick shoutout to person3362 and TheAnimezingGamer13 for following my story ALREADY! Thank you all so much!

Fair warning that I probably won't post very often, I have a lot of shit in my life.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL WHO CELEBRATE IT! Eat lots of Turkey

Disclaimer: I do not own Soul Eater :((

I hope you all enjoy this, here is the first chapter!

**Sierra**

"Get up, you lazy piece of shit!" A tall, redheaded figure takes a stick and whacks the lump of covers in front of her.

Hello. My name is Sierra, preferably Ra, Jones. I am a 14 year old girl.

Hello. My name is depressed. I am abused, bullied, and plagued by the thought of by best friend.

Why, you ask, am I scared to think of my best friend? Because she hung herself. And on her arms were the carved words, "Are you coming to the tree, R.J?"

I'm ready to die. I'm ready to die.

"I said, get up you little slut!"

I whimper. Then I slowly take of the covers that shield by body from pain, and I brace myself. My mother slaps me. "Morning, bitch. Now get to school."

I say nothing as I get dressed and back my school supplies. Today is hot outside, but I always wear some form of long sleeve to cover up my bruises, and other things.

When I'm ready I head out the door.

"Say goodbye to your sweet mother, honey," my mother comes in right as I step out the door. "Goodbye," I mumble.

"Good girl. Now get out the goddamn door."

I move silently outside and towards the school, but I have no intentions of going there. I head over to the park, where I spend most of my days. No one notices that I'm gone from school, and that's fine with me. I don't ever want to go to school, it's almost as bad as home. Constantly I'm thrown into lockers, garbage cans, even my head onto the steps.

"Freak!" They'd scream as I tried to get close. The teachers turn blind eyes. Whenever someone's tries to get close to me, well... Let's just say that nothing good happens to them.

Was it just my imagination? I wonder...

I look at my hand. Spreading it out, I will the blade out of my hand. I close my eyes and count to ten.

I open them.

I breath sharply. It's there.

A 6 inch double edged teal blue blade has appeared in the palm of my hand. And not completely out of it. It's sticking up from inside of my hand. I will it to come out more, and this time I watch. The blade continues to come out, going up from my palm and stretching to my middle finger, right over it, and over the back of my hand, stopping at my wrist. It has grown out from my hand itself, but it doesn't hurt.

I laugh a little. I look at my other hand, and I will the same thing to happen. It does. I will both blades back. And they sink into my hand. I cover my hands with my hands, doing my best not to cry.

'What am I' I think to myself.

Then, out of no where, a little voice in my head tells me, "You"re a weapon. Accept it."

And then I smile. For the first time in weeks, a real, heartfelt smile.

And I think to myself, 'You're getting better. Treat yourself."

Slowly, I pull off my black sweatshirt, revealing my bruised and scarred. My hands trace the white and red lines along my wrists, feeling the pain I inflicted on myself. I sigh.

Why does my life have to be like this?

A cold breeze washes over me, cooling me off, feeling good since I was roasting in my sweatshirt.

I laugh softly, laughing at the fact that this is the first time that I've taken my sweatshirt off in pubic in months. Maybe Lily would be proud of me.

Lily.

My smile fades, and I slip on my sweatshirt back on, suddenly overcome with heavy sadness.

_"Are you, are you_

_Coming to the tree_

_Where they strung up a man they say murdered three. _

_Strange things did happen here _

_No stranger would it be_

_If we met up up at midnight in the hanging tree." _

_"Are you, are you_

_Coming to the tree_

_Where the dead man called out for his love to flee._

_Strange things happen here_

_No stranger would it be_

_If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree." _

_"Are you, are you, _

_Coming to the tree_

_Where I told you to run, so we'd both be free._

_Strange things happen here_

_No stranger would it be_

_If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree."_

_"Are you, are you, _

_Coming to the tree_

_Wear a necklace of rope, side by side with me._

_Strange things happen here_

_No stranger would it be_

_If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree." _

A tear slips down my cheek. Soon I'm shaking, unable to stop. Lost in the memory, I don't realize a group of people walking into the park. So lost in my own emotions, I put these people in danger. I need to get out of here.

But I'm too late.

The group heads in my direction, and I quickly try to wipe my tears.

As they draw nearer, my instincts tell me to run, but I don't want to raise suspicion

As the group draws nearer, I recognize there are 7 people. There is a boy with hair sticking up everywhere thats white, probably albino, with razor teeth, and red eyes, along with a girl with light brown hair in two pigtails. There is another boy with odd colored hair, blue, and like Albino, it's sticking up in odd directions. He also has a star tattoo on one of his shoulders, which is unusual for someone his age. Blue is boasting something about "surpassing God," while the raven haired girl beside him is giggling politely. And there there is a pair of girls, probably sisters, symmetrically behind another boy. Both sisters have odd looking hats and red, form fitting crop tops with white ties. The taller of the girls has longer, more brown hair, with a pair of jeans, while the shorter has short, blond hair, with baggy, short denim jean shorts. The shirt one is laughing hysterically and is saying something about giraffes. Both have fairly curvy bodies. Now onto the kid in the middle. He is fairly pale, with black hair that has three stripes on its left side. His outfit is perfectly symmetrical, like the twins behind him. I'm guessing he has a thing about symmetry. He has strange eyes: On the outer rings it's more yellow, while toward the pupil it's more orange...

...Just like Lily.

How is this possible?!

Now that I think about it, this kid looks a lot more like Lily then I'd like to admit. The black and white style, the eyes, the shape of the face. The black hair, tamed on top but splitting toward the bottom.

My eyes start well up again, and I quickly try to wipe them away.

Once the group is upon me, the pigtail girl gives me a quick smile.

"Hi! I'm Maka, and these are my friends Soul," the albino, "Black*Star," Blue, "Tsubaki," the raven haired girl who is obviously crazy about Black*Star, "Liz, Patty," the twins, "and Death the Kid, but you can just call him Kid."

'What kind of name is Death the Kid?' I wonder to myself. "Hi," I say quietly back.

"Speak up, peasant! And bow before your God!" The Black*Star kid yells in my face. Instinctively, I shrink back, making myself as small as possible.

Tsubaki slaps Black*Star's head so hard he falls on the group, bleeding. I gasp.

"Black*Star! Don't be so rude! We talked about this!" She yells at him. She smiles apologetically at me. "Sorry about that."

"It's ok," I replay in my normal tone of voice, which is fairly quiet.

"Anyway," Maka takes the conversation back up again. "We're students from a school called the DWMA. Have you even heard of it?"

I shake my head no.

"Ok, so this might come to you as a shock, but.. um..." She hesitates. She looks at Soul who nod encouragingly. I make a note that they look like they are a couple. ".. There are people in this world who can turn into weapons."

I widen my eyes a little. "Weapons?" I ask, uncertain I heard right.

"Yes," Maka says enthusiastically. "Soul is one, another Tsubaki, and Liz and Patty. I am Soul's meister, Black*Star is Tsubaki's, and Kid is Liz's and Patty's."

She must have seen my confused face, so she continued. "A meister is the controller of the weapon. He/she wields the weapon while it is in full weapon mode."

I nod.

A voice speaks up. "You're taking this awfully calm. Are you sure you are alright?" It's Kid.

"Yeah.." I say, my voice cracking. I attempted to speak up, but looking into the eyes that belonged to my dead friend got me choked up.

'Damn hormones..' I thought to myself as my eyes welled up again with tears.

"Hey, girl, are you ok?" Soul asked, will real concern in his voice. That made me tear up even more, which sucked. Everyone looked really concerned for me.

"I'm fine," I managed, though it was clear that I wasn't. "I've just had a really bad day." Which was true, but that wasn't the main reason why I was crying.

"When do you think a good day would be when we could come back?" Maka asked.

"When I'm dead," I bit back. "Why would you care, anyway?" Immediately she regretted saying it. "I'm really sorry, but I need to get going."

Maka looked at me with pleading eyes. "One more question? Please?"

I sigh. "Make it quick."

"We we're notified by our 'headmaster,' you might call him, that there was a weapon in this area. Would you happen to know anyone who might be?"

I stiffen. How would they're headmaster know that I was a weapon? I only just figured it out myself. I relax my shoulders as much as possible. I shrug casually. "Nope."

Maka, as well as the rest of the gang, except for Patty, looked gloom.

"Oh well," Liz, the taller sister said solemnly, speaking up for the first time. "We tried."

"It was nice to meet you all," I say, trying to be nice after my out burst. I turn my back on them and walk away.

As I walk away, I hear a childish voice yell, "But what do we call you? you all are!

I stop, look over my shoulder, and see that it was Patty that had spoken. I smile sadly. "You don't call me anything. You'll forget about me before tonight, I can guarantee it." I meet each of their eyes, all lined with shock. Of course, all except for Patty.

And Kid. I feel nothing for him. It isn't his fault, and I know it, but he just reminds me too much of Lily. And she is gone. And I feel nothing.

I start to walk away again, ignoring their protests, and Patty yelling "BYE MYSTERIOUS PERSON!" And just,to see if they pay attention, slide my blades out, just to see of they are actually paying attention. I don't hear any gasps or anything out of the ordinary, so I put them back in, a tear falling down my cheek, against my will of course.

And so another day comes and goes,

_And I am alone. _

There you all are! The song sung in this is called The Hanging Tree by Jennifer Lawrence in Mockingjay part 1. I don't own that either.

Please leave a review! I don't care what it says, just no flames please!

Love you, thanks for reading!

-Maddie


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